DPS Machine

Ready for some pure, unadulterated ego stroking? Ok, keep reading....

Playing a DPS class can be fun. You've got good solo'ability which means you can level fast, complete daily "kill stuff" quests fast, farm primals and other goodies that come from dead stuff fast.

Of course, in the yin/yang that is life, those wonderful sides come with a down side. Basically, you're a dime a dozen. Because of those benefits, every Tom, Dick, and Harry rolls a DPS toon. Thusly, finding groups can be tough. With so many people playing DPS as just ez-mode classes, there's a huge number of retarted DPS players.

Making yourself stand out from the crowd becomes the challenge if you're interested in getting lots of group action.

When I first dinged 70 and was running all the normal-mode 5-mans, I think it was trapping that was the biggest stand out.

Groups clearly notice when they never have to worry about the turkey other than to slap a big Blue Square over its head at the start of the pull.

Over time, working with one or two people who I thought shined in their role and PuG'ing the remaining 5-man slots as much as possible, via trapping well consistently, I was able to shine among the crowd of DPS-tards.

This is the group I first started setting foot into Heroics with. Chain Trapping was king. We'd spend 4 hours in Slave Pens, and MAYBE make it to the first boss for a single badge. And pay 2 full repair bills for the effort. During that 4 hours, maybe 3:45 of it would include a turkey in my trap. Just tons of trapping as we struggled to burn down mobs.

As time rolled on, some drama and some non-drama stuff caused me to go separate ways from that core group of "shining star PUG friends" I ran lots with, and focused more on a core group of Guild-based shining stars.

As time rolled on more and more, it seems that our tanks got better at holding multiple mobs, and our normal group has a warlock and a mage, so my chain trapping is needed less often. Trap once, yeah. Trap twice, sometimes. Trap thrice or more, gettin' rare. Our collective DPS has grown to the point that we kill mobs fast enough that by the time my second trap is thawing, the tank is usually there to pick up the mob.

Then we start running Karazhan, the home of the Shackle. Only a couple pulls where I need to trap, and two traps on Moroes, and that's about it. I barely even equip my Beast Lord stuff anymore, I don't even need the 4-second trap cooldown reduction.

With the trapping needs declining, a new aspect of DPS-differentation has arisen...MQoSRDPS!!!!

But this is different than trapping. For the insecure narcisistic Hunter, ego stroking is a daily necessity. More important than sleep (what's that?) and food.

When you deliver good trapping, everybody appreciates it and pours the love. Nobody feels threatened by your role as a CC'er. When you top the Damage Meter, they want to top you. No Love!!!!

Sure, they stroke the ego by jokingly say they're gonna top you on the meter some time. Or when you die during the Attumen fight really early because you're a cosmic botard who can read a simple threat meter, they all cheer that they'll get to out damage you.

But, the fact is that they have grown to expect that consistenly high performance, and therefore are less apt to help fuel that massive ego :-(

So we turn to WWS reports to stroke the ego. Such as wednesday's visit to the Curator....1275 DPS baby!!!!!!!!

I dunno what the story is, but 1275? I was blown away. I hope its not a bug in WWS, because I'm a big fan of that number.

But that's not enough to satisfy this massive ego for one day.

Nope.

Roll back the clock a few hours. I'm out fishing in some infected sludge in Hellfire for the daily quest and a guild healer whispers me saying that in Heroic Under Bog they're at the last boss and their DPS druid bailed on them, can I help out?

Sure, I'd love a free badge.

Party up. Oh, who is this? The tank is the tank I used to run with back in my non-guild friends + pug days. So this guy remembers me as an unremarkable DPS'er with decent trapping skills and fun to play with.

Since then, he's joined one of the server's premiere raiding guilds. Regularly clears kara in a single night, clears gruuls, and plays around with other folks in full T4 and T5 gear. So he's no stranger to top notch damage output.

So we get past the usual hellos and how ya beens.

Takes forever to run the full way through the cleared dungeon.

Get there, he pulls nearly instantly.

Real quick misdirect, bestial wrath, blood lust brooch and pew pew pew. FD. pew pew pew. dead boss.

Rogue says "wtf? i was afk gettin dinner."

lol.

Tank friend says "wtf happened amava? you became a dps MACHINE"

Muwwwwhahahahahahaha

Muwwuwwhwahahahahahahahahah

Muahahahahahahahahahahahah

MuAHAHAHAHAHAHHA


MUWHWWWAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH

There, that's much better. My ego can rest for the moment.