Letter to Amava..."How have I wronged thee?"

Dear Amava,

What have I done to you? Why do you hate me so?

I just like to spend my time, slowly lumbering across southeast Zangarmarsh, not really bothering anybody, unless they swing by on some quest or other.

Sure, there's lots of herbs, and even a few mineral nodes in my neck of the woods, but that doesn't explain why you consistently go out of your rip off my own tenticles and beat me into the marsh with them.

Aren't there better places to see and harder mobs for you to kill?

You fly past me a couple times every day.

On your way to farm buzzard meat in Hellfire. On your way to do dailies in Blade's Edge Mts. On your way to gather Manaberries for cooking daily or Netherblooms for $$$ and superior mana oil. And then again on your way back to Shatt.

I see you coming, every day, and every day, I slowly go about my little routine of walking my route, trying not to make eye contact.

What's the deal with Tusker? You fly past her for that one cooking daily quest all the time. Why doesn't she get the special treatment also? Is it because she makes the sad pathetic sounding elephant death groan that brings out the carebear in you? You make me sick!

I don't even drop anything good, besides the occasional Strange Spore.

I think you're being a bit extreme, sending a big giant red beast growling at me, firing off Rapid Fire, Bladefist's Breadth, killing me with more than half your Bestial Wrath left. You're real tough. What am I, 9 levels below you?

And the herbs in my area aren't even the good ones!

I've been writing a letter a day to Blizzard to ask them to reincarnate me as a lvl 83 boss mob in the next expansion so I can get a little revenge. Any other guild, I'll just roll over and play Loot Vendor. But you, Amava? Pay back's a mutha, aint it?

WTF did I ever do to you?


-Boglash